The children and I have experienced a good day. After making an early run to Walmart, a physical exhaustion beset me and I ended up taking a nap on the couch. Maybe it was the fog I parted as I walked down the aisles of the store. The density of the haze would cause me to mentally stumble and forget my purpose for shopping. Napping on the couch momentarily cleared the haze. Unfortunately, when I awake the pall settled back in again.
I found today’s imagined fears not nearly as bad as the reality. A list of seven activities occupied my mind enough to get me through the afternoon…courthouse for car registration, pick up watch, get prescription from pharmacy etc… By the time I finished my errands the kids had come in from school.
Jerry stopped by the house this evening to drop off a pair of pants for Michael. I think Matthew surprised both of us by asking him to stay a few minutes. Matthew handed him his work from academic team and asked Jerry to quiz him from a list of 45 entries. Neither could see the tears well up in my eyes. Mark has given Matt a good fatherly foundation and Matthew intuitively understands the measure of a good mentor.
Thank you all for your encouragement and your prayers. I have made it through another day, one step at a time.
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23 users responded in this post
Julie,
I am praying for you! I know it’s hard, and yes, that is the ultimate understatement. I love you! One day at a time, one moment at a time! God will sustain you.
much love and prayers,
Lorie
Julie,
I have thought of you and the kids a million times in the past few days. I am so greatful that Mark left you with a smile. That plus God’s loving arms will sustain you. I have prayed for you throughout these long few days, I have prayed for comfort, for strength and for courage.
I am sending you the pictures of Mark’s Rainbow. What a glorious entrance to heaven.
I missed being at the funeral to share in the worship service and the celebration of Mark’s life. My thoughts and prayers are with you always!
God will be with you every step of the way, as you pave the path to the next chapter of your life.
In Him,
Heidi
Julie, I give you another standing ovation, for the task of getting up, AND out is a very important, first step, in your “one step at a time”. You then, got your children off to school, ran errands, took a nap (which you so richly deserve), gave your daughter words of encouragement in her difficult day, welcomed a friend into your home, and took the time, to update us all, who love you so much, on your day, and your feelings about it all!!:)) Again, yet another example of the WALZHOPE, Mark & You have given us all, and is proof that HE will sustain you, and carry you through the valley, and up to Your Mountain Top to feel the sun on your face, wind in your hair, and know that both you and the kids will be OK…we all love you Julie! We are your Team Walzhope!! Pulling for you all the way! (Maybe our mascot can be Jewels…or JULES!) Great, the Walzhope Jules!!
Julie,
It is good to hear from you again!! I have been praying for you and your family as you begin your new existance. What a lovely testimony you and the children were during the funeral. Probably the most precious memory of mine was your placing of Mark’s bible on the casket. The pages worn from YEARS OF USE and knowing how Mark had put so many hours of study in through the years !!! Not to mention our wet eyes and pounding hearts watching you calmly slip down the aisle with your instrument in complete control of the moment and the emotions that had to be flowing through you. Christ showing His love through you and you being so strong for your family! YOU ARE MY HERO!! Ha! Ha!
Well, you have been so blessed and I know you are a survivor… so I guess one day at a time will be your motto and your only way to make it through the fog. If you need an ear or a friend to hang with or just to cry with, please don’t hesitate to give me a call. In the meantime, I will be lifting you up in prayer and asking God to give you wisdom to take care of the important things and discernment to know what things are important!!!
Much love,
Tammy Jo
Oh dear sweet Julie, All your walzhope prayer warriors continue to lift you and the needs of your family to the Heavenly father. Take your time to get some much needed rest. The fog will lift in God’s own time. And you will be able to rejoice in the life you have and the memories of the love you and Mark shared. You will continue to see those beautiful children grow in favor with God and man just as Mark prayed for that. I can imagine a time when you will tell your grandchildren about what a wonderful grandfather they had and they will learn of Jesus and his love for them. For now rest and allow others to help you with chores. You will regain your strength and will know when it is time to go back to work and the activities that your family enjoys. I hope you will continue the making of memories that you started with Mark. You are loved and in our prayers.
The same God that gave Mark the courage to face the demon of Cancer; will give you the power to face each new day of life. You have seen your soulmate into heaven in a most commendable way. The tasks are draining and cause the need for you
to learn the art of spending some time alone until to recharge your body and soul. This would be a good tme for a trip to Gethsemane, to the trapist community;or, perhaps, a good time for an Emmaus Walk to help recharge your soul. There is a rapidly growing Emmaus community at Ashland first UMC. Probably, you have already gone, but, if not, this could prove an inspiration that will help you renew your walk with Christ in a powerful way. As I understand it, you take your bible, change of clothes, and journal to work on your new role as single parent and provider. Any single parent or single provider would greatly benefit from an Emmaus Walk! Talk to someone in your church family to see if they are a part of the Emmaus Community and would be willling to serve as your mentor in this event. I never had the opportunity to go on this retreat, but I am sure that someone in the Church would be willing to serve as your sponsor-mentor.
Even Jesus had to find time alone to pray and collect the spiritual resources for the work ahead. The disciples learned much from the ressurected Christ as they walked to Emmaus.
Words, the way the man’s hands handled bread and wine with prayer empowered them with the knowledge that the journey wasn’t over with Christ’s death — it was just begining with their experience and commitment. May God Himself minister to your needs there!
Julie,
Thank you for the walzhope link to you and your family. It brings
me closer to Ky and a reminder each day of your loss and suffering.
My prayers are with you as you take each day “one day at a time”.
God bless.
We love you and are still praying that you will feel God’s presence every minute of every day.♥
Julie:
We have thought of you and the children so often since Sunday night, and it was such a blessing to hear from you on Waltzhope again this morning. Everyone handles grieving in their own way, and you are clearly finding YOUR way to deal with your loss one step at a time. God. who loves you much more than you can ever fathom, understands your need to get through these hard days in your own way and your own time. Whatever feels right to you IS right for you. Words are inadequate to tell you how our hearts ache for you, but know that we are continuing to lift you and the children up in prayer. A very wise lady once told us, “Time passes on silent wings, changes and proves all things.” May it comfort you to know that this, too, will pass.
Love,
Frank and Idella
Isn’t God good to provide prayers and answers of those prayers to give us strength. You have so many praying for you. There is power in those prayers. We appreciate you and love you. May God continue to Bless you.
Love,
Ben & Jo
Julie, we don’t know each other but my husband and I were classmates of Mark’s at Asbury. My heart breaks for your loss. Praise God for his mercies, His grace and His comfort. I know you and your children are leaning on Him during these days. You will be in our prayers.
Blessings,
Jane and Warren Lathem
Dear Julie,
I think that now begins the hardest part of losing someone that you care about so much. You continue to be in Charlie and I prayers and I know that God will give you the strength to continue.
Mark meant so much to so many people and he did give us all a lesson on how to die. Something that in this day and age we try to sweep under the rug.
Love to you and the children and may God continue to hold you in His hands.
Dear Julie – though I’m dealing with a health crisis with my brother (needs prayer physically and spiritually) – you are never far from my thoughts and prayers. Each day and each hour has to be conquered. Living this new life can only be done with the strength of our Heavenly Father and I pray for that for you and for your children continually. This new journey needs as much prayer support as the past – and you will have that. Try to rest and recouperate as best you can and hold those precious children near to you.
Standing in the Gap for you, Gayle
Hi Julie,
I received this a few days ago from a school peer, and am so sorry to hear of your loss. I was a school chum of Mark’s, I am sure not one that he even talked about, but I remember him and his wonderful wit, as he was so funny. We did share times at River Valley Ranch where many of the Youth for Christ events were held. Although he may not have remembered me, we did share Christ and I still do today. I am sorry for your loss and will keep you in my prayers. Blessings, Judy (Riggleman) Harris
Dear Julie,
Well I am back on line after internet service down. Now, I can read about what is happening with you. Keep yourself busy and I know you will. Today, went for my morning run-walk with a friend and had to have a breakdown over Mark. Sorry, but the truth. The tears just flowed like a river. I told her all about you, Mark, and the children and his continous fight with the disease he battled. I told her he was the one I called when I needed help in my direction of life, my times of happiness and sorrow. I told her he was always there with a hearing ear and heart. So today, yes we miss our friend but know he is in no more pain and for that I am greatly thankful. Continous Prayers For All
Love Always
The Faulkners
Julie, you have found it is one step at aa time–one day at a time. You are all in my prayers.
Dear Julie,
You and the children have all been in my daily thoughts and prayers. I hope you are getting some much deserved rest. Am praying that the love you and Mark shared and the joy of your children will help you through this time of grief.
Hugs,
Tori
Dear Julie,
When I read: I know the plans I have for you,”declares the Lord,” plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.
I want to sing and shout: They that wait upon the Lord, shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and, they shall walk, and not faint! Blessed be the name of Jesus.
I think of you all, all the time. I pray for you all, all the time.
Love & Prayers always
i pray for you and the kids daily. I am coming to KY this weekend and want to go by the cemitary. Could you email me if by chance you get online this weekend, and tell me where the cemitary is, and where he is located? I would love to go by and visit him, since I wasn’t able to make the funeral. Thanks Julie. nmfwynn46@yahoo.com
Precious Julie,
You and the children are on our hearts daily, as you are on the hearts of so many people. The funeral was remarkable, such a beautiful celebration of an amazing life, and when you and the children walked down the aisle, so brave and beautiful, it was heartbreaking. I know Mark is very proud of each of you.
I got a blessing out of your description of how God enveloped you securely in His warm Light when you cried out to Him from the hospital couch. May that same God surprise you over and over with His comforting ways as you walk this difficult journey. Let Him rock you to sleep at night.
So proud to know you!
The Johns Family
Julie,
A scripture from Isaiah came to mind this morning when thinking of you and your children. “He tends His flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart; He gently leads those that have young.”
He is carrying your lambs close to His heart,
Robin
Julie, just want to let you know we’re still praying for you every day. I listened to an old song today and thought of you…
I have journeyed through the long dark night,
out on the open sea, by faith alone
and yet His eyes were watching me
The anchor holds though the ship is battered
the anchor holds tho the sails are torn.
I’ve fallen on my knees as I faced the raging seas
but the anchor holds in spite of the storm.
I’ve had visions, I’ve had dreams
Well, I’ve even held them in my hands
but I never knew those dreams could slip right thru, like they were only grains of sand
I’ve been young but I’m older now
Oh and there has been beauty these eyes have seen
but it was in the night
when I faced the storms of my life
Oh that’s where God proved His love to me.
The anchor holds though the ship is battered
the anchor holds tho the sails are torn
I have fallen on my knees
as I faced the raging seas
but the anchor holds in spite of the storm
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
Sent via Blackberry
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